Back to School Part 2

I don't think I want to bog you down with some of the grief and anxiety I've felt lately about enduring another semester... so I won't.

I had a great winter break being able to sit around, play video games, watch football, spend a week with family, and the wife and I even got to start a workout routine over the past 2 weeks (hopefully it'll hold up once work starts back). I was also able to make all my unit plans for biology and conceptual physics for the spring. I wish I worked a little more on making lesson plans for the first couple weeks though to get ahead. Although, this first week is going to be a little off since we had those snow days. Half of my classes will be taking last semester's mid-term, and I'm planning on taking a couple days to create some fresh investment for my class and our goals.

Tomorrow is a professional development day for teachers, which pretty much means I won't be able to do any work in my classroom to get ready for classes tomorrow because I'll be in faculty meetings. But since I don't have any lessons to run tomorrow, I'm enjoying tonight watching some football.

I watched an interesting video I found on TED about changing education paradigms and then I watched another talk by the same guy on the sidebar about the impact our current education system is having on our lives. I encourage you to listen to these. In the second video, the speaker, Ken Robinson, talks about how most people are unhappy with their jobs because it's not what excites them or fuels their passion. I resonated with that, and it kind of made me feel better about my near resentment of my job.

I guess I knew when I accepted and started the job that teaching wasn't my true passion. It's always been medicine or science. I think I've struggled with using that fact as an excuse for not doing as well as I want or not working  harder (if that's possible). But I think the fact that teaching is not my true passion contributes to the disenchantment with my work. It's difficult for me to balance that out with enough drive from my belief in the cause and the importance of my work for my students.

Sometimes it makes it easier on me and reduces my stress level to down play the importance of what's at stake, which I realize could be a bad thing if it led me to not care or to put less effort into the job. But I think it makes me put less mental effort on thinking about how much this matters and more on actually doing things. It might seem backwards, but I tell myself things like, "Who cares if I suck?" or "Who cares if I'm so bad they have to fire me?" It sounds outrageously careless, but it helps me do my job by taking the focus off of doing something that matches my theoretical idea of what it should be to actually getting something that works so I can sleep and be alive the next day.

Back to that video I mentioned before about people disliking their jobs, though, I applied for and took this job because I knew there was a need. Not primarily because I had a passion to teach. However, a part of me wants to teach. I've realized more and more that this is one of the greatest if not THE greatest service the world needs right now. I think another thing people should consider when following their passion is how their passion can best serve others. But I know now for me, that teaching is more of a service for me. I hate to say that I'm sticking it out until my commitment is up, but I kind of am. And hopefully on the way I'll be able to get some kids on track to a better future and maybe change some kids' lives.

I just better make sure I get started on my med school essays soon so I can get some big wigs at Vanderbilt to look over them and ensure my entry. I think it would be great to be a doctor and teach younger kids every now and then. Maybe I can work that out later down the road.

In other news, I'm very excited on the football front since my Chicago Bears are the No. 2 seed in the NFC playoffs with a 1st round bye. Plus, Ohio State (my favorite college team) is playing Arkansas this week which promises to be a great game. And hopefully Ohio State can help redeem the pitiful showing by the Big Ten in this year's bowl games.